it's always a little awkward for me when i'm sitting there in the store, painting or knitting or tidying up or paying bills or eating a sandwich, and someone starts thumbing through my humble basket of loose leaf watercolors. lately, it's been happening a lot, and every time, i feel just as vulnerable as any time before. so maybe i overhear the customer say something to their friend, like "hey did you see these little watercolors?". "ooh, that would be great for a kids room." or "this would be perfect in my kitchen". they'll ask "how much?" and one of us will say "sixty dollars". usually at that point i begin to get self-conscious and embarrassed, so i'll delve down into my work hoping the it will swallow me until i'm invisible. then james might say something like, "aren't those amazing? the girl who does those paintings has a blog where she posts one a day..." he'll be speaking about me as if i'm not sitting right there behind him, in an effort to embarrass me publicly with showers of compliments, something he lovingly loves to do. at this point i can feel my face turn a darker shade of hot. i might find an excuse to leave the room. or i might laugh awkwardly, which inevitably gives away my hiding spot in the low chair behind the counter.
"did you paint these?" the customer might say, peeking through to see me hiding there.
shit. i've been found out. "yes, i did.", blushing, beet colored cheeks
"i just love them. they're great."
no, really, seriously: i thank you. for noticing.